André: Hey ya miss Zombie White Girl, can I talk t’ya for a second?

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….

André: Stank you…stank you smelly much…hey Bentley can you grab my camera for me?  Okay miss, I just need to request a short moment from you, if you don’t mind naw…

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

André: Well you see, I know I’ve been on GQ and Esquire a mighty-ighty many times, and that Benjamin Bixby line is doin’ pretty well, but lately…well, to be honest, lately I haven’t been feelin’ like my dapper ol’ self.

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…?

André: Well, I wasn’t going to elaborate much on that, but since you’re asking — I’ve been thinkin’ a lot about what it means to be a legend…and I feel like I’m missing something…I’ve got the classic albums, been on the world tours, hell, I even inspired that one group  iLL-Literacy to go on and do their thang.

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….

André: Yeah, I think they’re amazing too.  Anyway, I’ve pretty much got the music part of my legendary status down.  I mean, not to be un-humble mumble, but I only have to record one verse a year an’ the whole world gets a-scramblin’ to post it up on their websites and such.  It really ain’t no thang.

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

André: Oh right, right, I’m sorry…the point.  Well, you know with so many legends passing lately, I’ve been thinking to myself, what do I need to not only prove that I’m a great artist, but also the MOST DAPPER artist?  Naw, I’ve got my straw hats, french cuffs, hell, I even wear wool cardigans in Atlanta and it’s never cold enough in Atlanta to wear wool cardigans!  And so I was thinkin’ about the greatest legend of all, Michael Jackson, and how stylish he could be in any siteeeation…moonwalking, in ancient Egypt, even as a zombie!

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

André: Okay, okay hold on shawtie, I know that wasn’t the best depiction of your people, but you see what I’m sayin’.  And so I thought about becoming a zombie myself, but there are some inconveniences to that…such as being undead.

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhh…

André: Yeah, tell me about it.  But me and Bentley, we was just walkin’ around this here street when I saw you!  And when I looked in your eyes, I just knew you were the one…and if not, you are the prototype…for the kind of zombie I need to take a picture with!

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhhhhh?

André: Well, this is more of a personal project, but I figure…if I can pose next to a disheveled zombie girl with a fucked up face (no offense, but it’s pretty fucked up), I’ll just know that I’m the most dapper of ‘em all!  So…mind if I take a quick picture with you?

Zombie White Girl: hhhhhhhhhh…

André: Thanks Zombie White Girl, you’re the best.  Just for that, I’m going to bless the earth with a new song!

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[André 3000 "Lookin' 4 Ya" (via Blind I)]